I am darker than what you see when you close your eyes.
I will talk about being rational, then talk about emotions after few minutes. I will say I love texts then I will call you at 2 am.
I will be tired, and still I would want to talk to you all night. I would say I wouldn’t make it and I will surprise you by knocking at your door at midnight on your birthday. I will say I don’t notice, but I would love your mascara.
I will say I like books, but I would love movies more.
I will say that I sleep early and I will stay awake till the dawn. I will wear t-shirts and I would secretly love suits. Don’t get scared, when I do that – I am not a hypocrite. I am a bunch of paradoxes. A bunch of negative and positive energies put together in a field.
I will not send long birthday texts on your birthday, or gift you something amazing. But, I’d bleed myself dry, if it comes to that. It will seem easy, but trust me darling, it isn’t. I will say I forget things, but I will remember that morning text you send me before the exams.
Your friends will hate me, but that’s not their fault. Your parents would hate me too. But, I’d wipe any trace of doubt by sneaking into your room late at night and hugging you tightly. We’d go for swims, I’d say I am afraid of waters so that I can just see you enjoy. I’d wake you up at night. I will not let you sleep during the day. An infatuation. An obsession. I’d make it a mutual addiction.
I’d stalk your timeline till 2008. And like everything you ever posted. I will flood your notifications. But more than flooding your notifications, I’d flood your mind with memories. Your phone’s storage with voice notes. And your days with love — no, not love. Something better than that.
I will listen to your music, I will watch your movies. And I’d love them too. Not because they are good, but because you love them. I’d watch slow romantic movie, just because you like it and wouldn’t sleep in the middle.
Then, I will say that I like you but I don’t love you. At that moment, just know that I love contradicting myself. So if you know me, you’ll know what I meant.